The human capacity for judgment never ceases to amaze me. I know it is every where and I shouldn’t be surprised by it at all, but every once in awhile it stops me in my tracks. Both when I hear and see other people doing it and when I find myself doing it. I know it is a human trait that is impossible for most of us to overcome, but it still strikes me as petty in most matters. For example: The “grass is always greener on the other side of the fence” judgment. I have the type of job where I can have a flexible schedule. This is one of the benefits of doing billing and accounts receivables for a living. And, for dealing with the angry public. For the summer, I am working four, 10-hour days a week. This gives me a day off plus the weekend. I organize it so that every other weekend, I have a four day weekend with the Friday and Monday before and after off. I still work 40 hours a week. 80 in a pay period. Anything more would be overtime. In order to work from 6am to 4:30pm , I get up at 4am . I am not skipping merrily into work at noon and leaving at 2. I slog just like the rest of you. But, my room coworker seems to think that I skip in to work merrily at noon and leave at 2. Just because I have a day off during the week. Her job is an 8 hour Monday through Friday deal. That’s the nature of that position. When you are “on-call” for other depts that are open during the full week, that’s the way it is. However, she snarkily comments on my cushy schedule and how it must be nice to have “long weekends every week”. It doesn’t occur to her that I’m still working a 40 hour week, the same exact amount of hours she works, but because I arrange the days so that I do have a four-day weekend every other week this allows her to pass judgment on my “cushy” schedule.
On a much larger scale, the green grass on the other side is glaringly apparent in folks who want more than what they have. The people who want to be richer than they are and use whatever example comes to mind. Big business, oil companies, computer gurus, and any other person who has some unbelievable amount of money are the usual targets. “Why does “X” deserve all that money, he/she/it should give it to me!” “Let’s redistribute the wealth!” Why? Why does anyone have to give their money to people who are jealous and judgmental? Isn’t that what taxes are for? But, wait, here’s “they should have to pay their fair share of taxes!” Really? And you don’t take advantage of all the credits and deductions you can too? Are you paying your “fair share” when you’ve pumped out a bazillion kids and now I, as a taxpayer that doesn’t get a kid credit, have to fork over more than my “fair share” to pay your kid credit? Just because you can procreate doesn’t mean I owe you money. That doesn’t seem “fair” in my book. Maybe you shouldn’t have kids you can’t afford? And, that’s where my judgmental side comes out.
We have lost in this country the ability to say, “hey, I want “X”, maybe I should work for it.” I have worked for everything I have in my life. And while some folks would see me as the target of their “redistribute the wealth” scheme, I happen to think that if I got what I have today by working hard, so can they. I made choices in my life that allowed me to save my money and not squander it. I live below my means. That is how you save money. You do not live above your means. And, when the crap storm of recession hits, you have something to fall back on. Do I want the 4,000 sq ft house with all the amenities? You betcha. Do I have it? No. I have a 1200 sq ft house that is exactly what I need to live comfortably but doesn’t keep up with the Joneses. And, it’s paid off. Four years early on the mortgage because we chose to put extra money to the principal instead of squandering the cash on clothing, eating out, expensive toys, and other frivolous stuff that judgmental human beings seem to think they need to prove themselves worthy individuals. So, again, why should I have to redistribute my wealth to pay for you and your frivolous pursuits? You can do the exact same thing I did. You want to judge me? Well, I can judge you right back. Stop wasting and whining your life away and do something about it. You don’t like your job? Find a new one. You don’t make enough money? Get an education and find a why to improve your financial status. Or, here’s a thought, you don’t really need the latest fashions from Paris . You don’t need the giant-ass house, you don’t need the Harley, you don’t need a $20,000 plus car. You don’t need a $500 a month phone bill. You don’t need all the cheap crap you buy on a daily basis because you think you HAVE to have it. That brand name coffee you just dropped $5 bucks for? No, you don’t need that. And the $10 lunch you buy every day? No, you don’t need that either. So, again, why do I have to redistribute my meager wealth because you are making very poor financial decisions?
Yet I get judged by the same people who want something from me. My co-worker wants information from me. Wants me to fix her computer. Wants me to agree with her on everything. Wants me to give her answers, easy answers, to her problems. And then judges me when I don’t do any of what she wants. Because I’m married that somehow translates to “easy street” in her book because there are two incomes. Yet, she owns a house, a brand new car (which cost more than either of my two cars), and everything else that goes with life and still is not happy. I pointed out to her once that a homeless person would kill for her life and she got mad at me. I’m not making light of homeless people, but the old adage of complaining about painful shoes to an amputee comes to mind. She is wealthy beyond measure to someone who sleeps in shelters and calls nowhere home. Yet, she doesn’t see it that way. She’s the victim, she’s the one oppressed, she’s the one who life is kicking and ignoring. Because she doesn’t have money beyond count, she is the one “owed” something by big business, oil companies, computer gurus, and me. If you can’t even convince a person they have wealth whether or not they see it, there is no hope for this country. We will de-volve into whiny victims begging for cash while driving our expensive cars and complaining that the couch and curtains do not match.
