Something nice

This past Tuesday night (May 3rd) I received an Outstanding English Student award from UW-Sheboygan Faculty. I was informed that I had been selected for an Honor about two weeks before, but the school kept it secret and only tells the students about their Honors on the night of the presentations. Ever since 2008 when I went back to school, I've never really had the chance to become really active on campus. A full time job, a house to run, a husband, friends, and lots and lots of studying somehow prevented my involvement. So, it was a shock to me when I was told it was an award given to me my by professors. I was stunned they even remembered me. I have no illusions that somehow every one of my professors remember who I am as they see so many students pass through that how could they? So when Student Services informed me of this, I first thought it was a mistake, then a practical joke, and then just shock.

I still have a hard time considering myself a "good" student. As I've mentioned before, my first year of college was well, not a full-blown disaster, but I was suspended for one semester for crappy grades. I just never went back until 2008; 20 some years later. My English 102 professor, Azor Cigelske had his class start a blog for weekly assignments, and even though I'm not a faithful contributer now that that semester has long ended, it does help with venting on the occasion and with keeping up my writing skills. At the presentation ceremony, he said very nice things about me and I'm still stunned that he would remember me after all the semesters of students coming and going. However, his class was one of two that were my first classes back, and it had been a very long time since I had written a college paper, or any paper for that matter. If I had done poorly in that class and the algebra class I was also taking, I wouldn't have continued on with my college studies. They were my litmus classes and thankfully I did very well in them and received encouragement from both professors to restore enough of my confidence to continue on. I seriously doubt that either now or at the time either one of them knew how much I had placed in their professional judgement of my work as to my "worthiness" to be a college student.

So, thank you Azor for not only the very nice things you wrote about me at the Honors Convocation, but for giving me enough confidence to continue on. It was a huge decision for me to go back, but ultimately I know that I will be very happy I did and am able to, albeit late, correct a life mistake that would have had me regretting and doubting myself forever.